how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what do u call a black men standing on top of a church. holy shit

thumb_up thumb_down -26

can you touch your toes? no

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man was shot. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

knock knock whose there? i don't know...

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A teen walks in on his parents having sex. He then vomits in his mouth and shuts the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops