Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

united we sit, cause we're fat

What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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