Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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Q. Which is longer ... a rope ?

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

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What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

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Wanna hear a story bout my uncle turza.... My uncle turza was eating fruit loops one day and there was a squirrel in the trre from 2 days ago he got angry because the spoon was from the phillipines so he punched a whole in the wall and his half uncle cousins sister had a cage.... True story

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

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What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? No. Yeah, he died.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops