How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops