(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

thumb_up thumb_down +10

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

pudding

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

thumb_up thumb_down +10

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Nineteen terrorists walk into three airports. Several hours later, thousands of people are dead sending the world into a state of emergency that subsequently changed how we live our current lives under the constant threat of both government oppression and extremist terrorism.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops