What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

How did the black person die? Of old age

What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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