My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

3 brothers Mohammed, Ahmed and Saahad were on the 09:25 flight from Tehran to New York. They each only carried a rucksack each and a one way ticket. They are Syrian refugees and their parents are dead.

There's a black man and a mexican in a car who's driving ? The black man because the mexican is intoxicated and they both want to prevent serious injury or death

One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

Knock knock. Who's there? A bad joke.

Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootise pop? No, seriously, does anyone know?

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

People are like trees. When hit multiple times with an ax they fall down.

Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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