Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

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Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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What's black and white and red all over? Lots of things, including certain ugly clothing.

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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Women's rights

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? She was blind

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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HAPPY NOVEMBER 2

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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The mets are 3-0 this season

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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