Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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how many baby's does it take to clean paint your house red. depends on the quality of the crusher.

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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What is black, can fly and sing? R. Kelly.. "I believe I can fly"

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Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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Guest what in the butt

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There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

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Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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what did the baby say to his mum? he sed bfirbvuirnvkjwmndckie

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What's blue and smells like red paint Blue paint.

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one stop shop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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