ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

Roses-are-red violets-are-blue Justin's-for -me Not-for-u if-by-chance u-take-my-place I'll-grad-fist &-smash-ur-face

You know what's natural? Bears.

Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

What do you call a black man? A normal human being

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

A baby seal walks into a club.

what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

A russian gives away vodka.

What do Grant and Lee have in common? They're both black males

What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

What do you call a teenager who cant add? A Total Failure

What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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