A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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why did the mexican cross the road? Becuase his other one was stolen by a Black.

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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National security?

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops