Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Orange! -door opens- You fucking come over here selling oranges one more time Julio and I will have you deported.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the gas man, I've come to read your meter, like we arranged.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

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whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops