Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Beka has AIDS

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How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

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Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

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Is there anything better than pussy? Ya a really nice book

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops