What hurts like hell? HELL

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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So a seal walks into a club.

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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Screw it you write the joke.

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If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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