Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

A Serbian Film

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

why did Susie cry? she got pecked in the face by a goose

What happens if you go one louder? Nothing because you can't

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

There was an english man, and irishman and an pakistani sitting in a bar. What a wonderful example of racial & cultural differences bing put to one side while they are socialising in a friendly environment.

Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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