How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

When Zeddie LIttle takes an Unflattering picture, millions of Internet people ask him why he looks Wierd in it. He says, "well, I was having a really tough day that day- my grandpa had just died- and I didn't feel like caring about what I looked like." Either way, he essentially fades into the darkness as the new fad takes over.

why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

Q. What is a similarly between Jewa and Pizza. A. There both baked in a over

How many dead babies does it take to paint a car? It depends on how fast you drive.

A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

p lkl

what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

Why was New Zealand attacked by Australia? New Zealand attacked Australia due to a teritorial dispute. The war lasted for 3 years with over 150000 deaths.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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