Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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i walked into a bar, the bar tender for some reason said get out. the bartender did not realise that i was the #1 criminal in america. but why would he, i was in cuba. ( i was seven at the time)

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What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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