why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

KARL KARASHIAN - FACEBOOK

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

thumb_up thumb_down -7

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's brown and sticky? My ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken. How do you get a baby to run faster? Chase it with the lawn mower. What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor? An erection. What do you get when you put a dead baby in a blender? Hold on. I'll tell you in a second. What's pink and spits? A baby in a frying pan. -S

thumb_up thumb_down -7

OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A horse walks into a bar and asks the bartender "why the long face?" The bartender replies "this is the fourth time this week a horse walked into my bar and every time it happened i have to clean up a bunch of horse pooh!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops