What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

no.

Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

what do you say to a woman on her rags? nothing.try and ignore it.you didn't hear this from me and we never talked.

Q-whats worse than getting shot. A-getting shot twice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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