Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

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What do Whitney Houston and Selena Gomez have in common? They are both dead. Exept for Selena Gomez..

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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