Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

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Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops