What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

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What's the difference between Obama and a monkey? They are two different species, so thus they are very different.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Screw it you write the joke.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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