knock knock Person A: who's there Person A: oh shit that was me

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

What's red and can sing? Elmo

Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

A man walks into a bar gets drunk passes out then goes to rehab because he has a problem

What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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