Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

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What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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How many black people can you fit into a cardboard box? Depends on how big the box is.

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Two penguins in a bath tub, one says "Pass me the soap" and the other one says "What do you think I am, a radio!"

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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What would you do if I said a horse ate your mother? It doesn't mattet, I didn't

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Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops