So, a man walks into a bar. Suddenly, the universe around him cracks, unable to sustain the weight of infinite potential punchlines. He tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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Y' can't spell rape without ape.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

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roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

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roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

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Why was the girl talking to the trashcan? Her entire family was killed in a forest fire. She was the only who made it out but she had several scars and burns. For six years she had no family to talk to. She then gathered an obnoxious amount of cheaply made plastic trashcans and painted her entire family on the trashcan and proceeded to talk to it. For several years now she has been in deep conversation with the trashcan. She then attempted to ask the trashcan a series and intense question in which the trashcan did not respond to. The girl grew very frustrated with the trashcan because it did not answer her question so she angrily threw it off the side of a cliff in the middle of the woods. To answer the question above, as the trashcan was violently falling off the cliff, the girl yelled, "See you next FALL"

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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The american education system.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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