If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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Your momma is so old, it is likely that she will pass away in the near future, and I would recommend you to spend some quality time with her.

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A Fairly ghetto African-American male and a Korean Merchant pass each other on the streets of L.A. two weeks after the Rodney King riots, what happens? The merchant nods his head to say hello to the African-American and the African-American male does the same and they both live out sucessful lives. By the way the African-American just got accepted to Harvard on a scholarship program.

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Why did the small child cry? He was forced to dig his own grave at gunpoint.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

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Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

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What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

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There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

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I saw Scarface uncut last weekend. It was called Face

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

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what is big and white? Your Mom

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what did the black women name her child jamaal

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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A man visits an anti joke site looking for some humor. realizing that its not funny, he closes the window.

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What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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