Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

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"I know it. I can feel it in my nuggets." -Chicken Joe

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What is Yellow and American? A yellow american

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a toothpick

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench A bench can support a family of five

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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why did the baby cross the road i tied it to the back of a car

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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A black man, a Pakistani and Jew sit at a bar. It's great to see such a cosmopolitan community.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

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whats ironic about a white van being white the driver usualy is not

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What comes after 69... Mouthwash

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non poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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