Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

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There's a black man and a mexican in a car who's driving ? The black man because the mexican is intoxicated and they both want to prevent serious injury or death

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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