What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's stupid a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

thumb_up thumb_down +3

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops