what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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i hate non minorities!

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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Bryson got a concussion...he died

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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What is white and flys at you from a tree? A refridgarator. I lied about the flying part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops