Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

Justin Bieber

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

Starting a Genocide #YOLO

The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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