Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

there were 2 black men and a mexican man in a car. who as driving? we cant tell from the problem but is is more likely it is a black guy because there are 2 of him and 1 mexican.

You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

what's worse than getting hit by a car? getting hit by a truck

Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

i want to watch t.v, how do u turn it on? idk, do u know how? idk either, i cant see or hear then y do u want to watch t.v wuts a tv?

Q:What has more brains than the baby you just shot? A:The wall behind it!!!

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What did the black man say to the watermelon? Watermelon.

Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

Whats worst than a cold? Being shot in the face repeatadly by a rocket launcher until death.

Where is Tampa Bay, Florida?

What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

Why did the bear fall down? I shot it. Why did the second bear fall down? It tripped over the first one.

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...