Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Fuck off!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops