How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

A man walks into a bar, asks the bartender for a beer. Bartender says, "That'll be $3.50." Man says,"The joke maker did not explain monetary transactions."

Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

I'm Batman.

11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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