Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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HOLY COW!

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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penis in the camel

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what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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FUCK YOU

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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