In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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Sir, your wife is dead

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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Rebecca Black just died, she walked into a stadium and was overwhelmed by the amount of seating choices.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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Okay.

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Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Yo mamma is SO fat, she is classified as fat.

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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