A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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How do you get a black man out of your seat? You ask him very nicely with a great attitude.

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I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did Lou Gehrig die from? ALS

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

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What's brown and slimy? brown slime

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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