Why did the guy get glasses? So he could get his dick into the vagina.

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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What did Reed read? A. Read?

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What did the resently released criminal get for his birthday? a nice sweater

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

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A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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A man removed Stephen Hawkings hand off his keyboard, what did Stephen say to the man? Nothing his hand isnt on the keyboard.

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Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

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A:Knock Knock B:It's open

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops