What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

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A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

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Good job, son.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did I get thumbs down from everyone? Answer: Because they hate my anti-joke.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

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Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

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what is the different between a prostitute and your wife one is on contract and the other pay as you go

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops