Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

thumb_up thumb_down -1

dont you love porch monkeys? no.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops