What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

Why did the chicken cross the road...

Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

What's worse than the Holocaust? Someone born in the 1970s feeling self-righteous about defending the victims.

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

What do you get when you cross rice flour,vegetable oil,corn oil,cottonseed oil,soybean oil,dried potatoes,corn flour,maltodextrin,wheat starch,modified rice starch,sugar and mono-and-di-glycerides,malted barley flour,wheat bran,dried black beans and salt? Pringles,Multi Grain,truly original

A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...