What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

Why is the wimpy guy so strong and angry now? Because he took steroids.

What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

How do you greet your great great grandmother born in 1738? Hey, what's up, hello.

Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

say sopha king together then sat funny at the end

A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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what is more fun than shower time with adele. a mass gang bang with antonia

who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

Q: A squirrel a chipmunk and a spider monkey are fighting over these nuts. Who gets them? A: Your Mom ;p

Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

whats red and hard to eat a brick.