There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

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What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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French man: Bonjour! English man: um, i am not french! french man: oh, My chat is on this beautiful country! Her name is Valentina! English man: What you poo in the open and name them?

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how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

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Jebron Lames.

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Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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What's the difference between a cat and a banana? One is a cat, the other is a banana.

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And so the Lord said unto John "Come forth and receive eternal life," but John came fifth, and won a toaster instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops