What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

why did the chicken cross the road? because aliens dont wear purple hats.

What comes out of a zit? Purple poop.

Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

A man bought a white van, He later brutally molested a small boy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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