Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

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How do you kill a blonde? By irreparably damaging a major organ. The same way you kill anything else.

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

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Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

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What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

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How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back. Then look down and realize there's still an active grenade in your hand. You've just become the joke

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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