why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

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Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Caroline Kelly.

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

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What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

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How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops