How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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