cchina is communist the USA isnt WHY?

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

Who row's? •Liam Findlay

Why is Ian's name Ian? Because he was adopted

Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

knock knock who's there? your destiny

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What is the worst joke ever? This one.

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...