Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

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Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? Nothing, they were the ones convicted of raping that white girl.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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