John Cena for president

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

Ebola

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

Why do white people drive big trucks? 'Cause they can afford it.

What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...