Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

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A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

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what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

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what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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I'm going as the joker for halloween

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops