Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

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whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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