- Anti Joke

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

What's better than a stick? A stone

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.